One of the few memories I have of spending time with my dad was the strange weekend he decided to take us fishing. Strange, because most weekends and holidays, he’d be in Vegas hitting up the blackjack tables at Caesars Palace and pretending to be a high roller. This was years before we discovered he was gambling away our house, his investments, my college tuition.
He showed up one day with a couple of fishing rods he bought on the spur of the moment. Not unlike the jewelry or dollhouses he’d come with from his business trips because he just “couldn’t stop himself.” We packed a cooler with soft drinks and weird Chinese camping snacks: anise soy sauce roasted tofu skins, salted sour plums, sweet gooey sesame ladened soy protein artificially colored with red 40 and drove off in our silver Buick sedan to Yucaipa lake, one hour east of Los Angeles.
We arrived at a deserted lakebed and stepped out into the musty desperate heat. What a lake was doing in the middle of the southern California desert is beyond me, but I never questioned it at the time. Nor did I question who the hell my father was pretending to be, bringing us here to do something he himself had never attempted. Maybe he felt guilty and trying his hand at being a “family man.”
Love this! Oh my god, so awkward, just perfect and horrifying and sad. It really captures your dad, his impulsiveness, his trying to buy your love at times. I can just imagine him seeing some fishing rods somewhere and thinking, "I should buy those and take my children fishing."
ReplyDeleteLove the whole concept of "weird Chinese camping snacks" (love the use of "weird" throughout, I'm a fan of that word), and the items are amazing: "anise soy sauce roasted tofu skins, salted sour plums, sweet gooey sesame ladened soy protein artificially colored with red 40." And "musty desperate heat" is great. So is the title, the name of this lake so like some kind of happy family destination yet "deserted."
Oh actually you only used "weird" once, the other time was "strange"--but yeah, loved "strange weekend" also.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the words of encouragement. I was worried this was going to sound like a diary entry. By the way, the last quick write was also about my dad, from his point of view.
ReplyDeleteWow, this is great and knowing that your first piece was also about your dad! I love this line: "We arrived at a deserted lakebed and stepped out into the musty desperate heat."
ReplyDeleteThat's great description vivid and viseral -- musty desperate heat." The great weird name Yucaipa of the lake is the perfect name for this piece, and I love detailed memory of the "weird Chinese Camping snacks."
I really love the voice, the narration, in this piece. It feels effortless, true, unassuming, reflective. Natural. The narrator could easily rip into the father (he's gambled away so much, it sounds) but there is something deeper at work here; the desire to empathize and understand (Maybe he felt guilty and was trying his hand at being a “family man”)leads me to trust the narrator's strength and purpose and want to continue this exploration for meaning with her. A really wonderful voice. And I totally agree with the comments about the weird, the strange, and the musty : )
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